How is Media Affecting Me?

How is Media Affecting Me?  That is the million dollar question, isn't it?  It is amazing how much of my life is affected by media.  We are led to believe that all these items such as the Internet, IPhones, etc., save us so much time.  We can literally do anything from our phones now.  We can check directions to where we need to be.  We can look at the Internet, check our email, get an address, look at the sale ads, load our coupons onto our phones, you get the picture. 

But these items also use up a lot of our time as well.  We find it easy to read about what all our Christian friends are doing in their lives to minister to others, when we could be ministering to others.  We look at our friends' vacations, home makeovers, etc, instead of spending time with our families.

We really spend less time using these media items than most people.  Yet it is still more than my husband would like, and more than we probably should.

I think we can do a lot of good things using the Internet and all our media tools.  But maybe we should remember that charity begins at home.  It is fine to support a child in Mexico, but maybe there is a family in my child's school that could use some help with clothing or groceries.  Lots of people are out of work you know.  I think we all need to remember that we should reach out and touch those around us first.  If I seek God first, and ask him to show me the opportunities He places before me, I will be able to use these media options to seek God's glory.

Thank you, Courtney, for allowing me the opportunity to link up to your blog.  I have enjoyed this series.
Thanks for stopping by!  Honey

Media and Our Parenting

Hi!  Welcome to my blog where today I am linking to Women Living Well for Media Monday.  Today we are discussing Media and Our Parenting.  This is such a big topic in today's life.  I know twenty years ago when my husband and I started parenting, many things were not even an item that are SO important now.  My children are all adults now.  When they were little I didn't have an IPad.  But I do have a Blackberry now.  We text and stay in contact a lot with tweets, emails and photos going back and forth.

Cell phones are probably one of the biggest concerns under this topic.  Kids start carrying cell phones at very young ages now.  I know children who have had them at 8!  I know and understand that it is very important to be able to reach your children, and for them to be able to reach you.  I think it would be wonderful to be able to get a phone where the only number that could be called were ones that were programmed in.  That way your child could only dial a parent, or someone else you authorized.  This probably already exists, and I am unaware because I don't have that need anymore.  But I think that would be a good tool to control cell phone use in small children.  Back before all cell phones could get free texting, our daughter was being "bullied" by some other girls through cell phone usage.  They texted her line so many times, our cell phone bill was Fed Xed to us in a box, and was over $1,800 for the month!  The company understood that we did not use texting before that bill, and numerous people were texting each an every minute for a couple of days.  The bill was reduced and our children lost their cell phones. 

I feel that children should not have Myspace or Facebook accounts.  But many will any way.  My daughter, today is 22 years old.  So the story I am going to share is not about keeping young children away from technology.  This is about not realizing that something can happen in your family.  Our daughter befriended a male on Facebook.  She did not know him, but he was already friends with her cousin and her twin sister.  None of the three girls actually knew him, it just appeared someone knew him.   He was from out of town, actually out of state.  He never said much on my daughter's page, occasionally commenting on a photo, etc.  She never commented back to him.  In April, where we live in Alabama experienced tornadoes.  Our whole county was without electricity for over a week.  This young man did not see my daughter on the Internet for over a week.  We did not know that he thought he and my daughter had a relationship of some sort.  He got in his car, and drove 16 hours to get to the town my daughter works in.  She had on her facebook page the name of the business where she works, and he was able to guess what town she was in from googling her name.  He rented a motel room for a week and made plans to see my daughter and see what developed from there.  He walked in my daughter's place of business and introduced himself.  He said he could tell the future and he knew she would not be in Alabama much longer.  She called me, I called the police, and the story goes on.  He was in town for a week.  Any time he made physical contact with my daughter the police were called and reports were made.  When she started avoiding him, he started contacting other family members and voicing concern over not being able to get in touch with our daughter.  He was so nice people were answering him!  I had to ask everyone not to answer him because he was a stalker.  What if my daughter had not had family to support her?  What if he had been able to make his first contact with her when she was alone?  The outcome may not have been what we would want.  I hate to think about it.  We never think these things will happen to our family.  My daughter was certainly old enough to chose to be on Facebook.  She didn't think she put enough person information on the Internet for there to be a problem, but she was wrong.  Check what your children are doing and be aware.

I found out when my daughters went to a Private/Home school, that there are Christian social pages available.  A couple I remember were Christian.org, and Lifespace.  I sure there are others, and this might be something you'd like to look at closer.

One other thing I would like to share from past history.  I had a reason once to "google" my child's name.  I was surprised at what showed up posted on another child's social page about my daughter (different daughter).  So sometime try that.  It may not be your child doing the posting, but the information could still lead down a dangerous path.

Computers take a lot of time away from our families.  Whether it is the parent or child using them.  I think families that I have know who were most successful in controlling what there children did on the computer, kept the computers in a public place in their home.  We never had more that one when our children were small, but today, I think I would do that.

I think limits on TV time as well as video games should control any problems or abuse of these items.  What your child watches should also be open to discussion and review.  Just this weekend some children from church stayed overnight.  The 9 year old girl kept talking about and wanting to watch 16 and Pregnant and Teen Moms.  I said the girl was too young to watch such a show and we didn't watch those at our house.  She said, "why not?"  I said it was a trashy show and she didn't need to spend time watching something like that.  I felt like I was putting my foot in my mouth, and should really not be having this discussion.  Later she and her 11 year old sister came into the room my husband and I were in.  The History Channel was on that television.  Her sister said, "Ya'll watch shows like that?"  and her younger sister said "yes, they are Christians".  I don't know what they watch at home.  It was a very odd conversation, and very unsettling to me.

It might be a good idea to have your child's email passwords so you can check their account usage.  I do think that being able to email and text your child could lead to discussing things the child may not want to talk to you about face to face. 

It is obvious Media will only become a bigger problem in the future.  This is a subject we need to stay aware of and continue to monitor to protect our families. 

Thanks for stopping by! 

Honey

Media and My Marriage

Today electronics and media in various forms are a part of all areas of our life.  There are very few places anymore, in the US, that you can get away from cell phones.  These electronic devices are attached to us, and we are expected to be accessable 24 hours a day. 

How does all this affect our marriage?  My husband and I are not the most technical people you've met.  We are probably the last people to update or get new devices.  We have a desk computer that we share which is on line for Internet.  My husband has a laptop that is Internet accessible, but he does not connect to the Internet.  We do not email each other, because Pappy doesn't have email.

I have a Blackberry, which Pappy bought for me so that when we travel so I could access Internet and email.  My husband has a basic cell phone.  I text because I have to.  Our tenants will do practically anything to avoid talking to me when they owe rent.  But Pappy doesn't like to text.  He worked third shift for years, and we would talk to each other every night at 10:00 when I would call him; and then he would call me in the morning if he wasn't going to be in before I left.  Now that he is retired, I do text him through out the day, mostly about our properties or the kids, and he will text a short answer if needed.  Usually he just reads what I have to say. 

So Media has not affected my marriage a great deal, accept that we are available to each other at all times.  Every once in a while my husband will text me a sweet message, and I know it is a big deal, and he made a special effort to let me know how much he thinks of me.  And I want to melt, and be certain I am being the wife he deserves.

Currently we are struggling a little with media and our marriage.  Since Pappy doesn't use the Internet, he doesn't understand a lot about it.  Lately I have been spending a lot of time online, trying to develop a blog, mentoring a B90 Days group, etc.  Yesterday he told me he wished the computer would blow up.  So I need to get a better schedule going so I can get what I need to do, done.  And still be sure that I am able to take care of my family, my home, and make certain my husband realizes how important he is to me.

Media Monday: Media and Our Walk with God

I am following a new series at Women Living Well called Media Monday. This series is about how the social media and Internet type activities in general affect our lives today. The age we live in has appliances and apps to perform just about any duty or action we need. We can hire people to do what ever we want. Accountants, lawn services, house keepers, you name it. But still we are rushed. We live in one of the most stressful times ever. With all the time saving devices we have today, we have trouble fitting in the things in our lives that are most important. Quality time with our children, alone time with our husbands, worship time with our Lord. The easier our life is supposed to be, the harder it seems it is to make time for the important things.

With progress, comes distraction. Computers allow us to talk to friends and relatives far away in a second, but we forget to spend time with the people in the same room with us. We can schedule a trip on line, but we forget to spend real time in The Word.

The Internet has really opened my eyes spiritually. I never knew that Christianity could look so different, and have so many different beliefs until I started spending time with others in blogland. I have an access to meet like-minded women who share my beliefs and feel the same way I do about important things. That is hard to do in real life sometimes. The Internet makes comparing several versions of scripture so much easier than it would have been just a few years ago. But sometimes we get distracted too easily by what our friends posted they are having for dinner, or by playing the latest video game.

Phones buzz and ring anywhere and everywhere, even church! I feel drawn to check my texts in church, because I have young adult children, and I think "what if they are hurt and need me?" But for eons of time, people have been able to sit through an hour service without being in touch with the outside world. I need to work on this distraction in my own life.

My husband and I make a conscious effort to limit our time on the Internet. My husband would laugh at that statement, because he never gets on the Internet. But we have boundaries to protect our family and our marriage from the distractions found in this world bombarded with media and the like. I think we all need to be extra careful to "Seek first the kingdom of God" and the put our families next. I plan to think about this over the next coming weeks. Maybe you will decide to, too.